Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Last Saturday I woke up from my afternoon nap with my cellphone ringing.
I got out of bed and looked at the phone, as I don't like the phone and I hate talking on it. But, this call was from Mam.
"Hi Jeeem. I am in the bus now."
"The bus? You're going home."
"Yes. Please don't be mad at me."
"Mam, I'm not mad. I'm disappointed. There is no reason for you to go back to Wang Hu Gwang again. Your mother is in the hospital, but she's okay. We don't have the money for this Mam."
"I'm sorry. Please don't be mad."
"Whatever. Why can't your sister handle this? Does she ever help out with the family? All she does is throw money at everybody. What about Miuw? She's seventeen years old, it's not like she's ten years old. She can take care of your mother once she gets out of the hospital."
And so the conversation went. Mam hates confrontation of any kind, and certainly confrontation from me because I make perfect sense and she knows it. Mam doesn't know how to handle money, and so after my last paycheck of 80,000 baht she squandered much of it away, going back to Wang Hu Gwang because her mother asked her to.
So what? You say...well, Mam isn't really needed there. I don't have a new job lined up, and the money won't last forever, so for her to go home for Songkran, come back home with me, then leave again when she's really not needed, is to me, just a big waste of money.
No, I didn't get ballistic. No need. It's her mother, I understand that. But, where is the rest of that goddamn family when help is needed? Gai, Mam's sister, is nothing but a show horse. She's got the excessively expensive cellphone she doesn't need, the fancy-ass car, the rent-free house on her company's property, the two extra jobs, and the husband who is a royal jerk. But, does she ever volunteer to help out at home?
No, of course she doesn't. She's a Bangkok bunny now. Big-wig wannabe. Always acts like her caca doesn't stink, and like she's so damn busy all the time that she can't be bothered with stuff from her tiny home village where she was raised.
Then there is Maak and Miuw. Mam's children. Maak is twenty-one years old. He's one of the laziest pieces of crap I've ever seen. Still living at home, sleeps till two or three in the afternoon, then gets out of bed, goes to the bathroom, takes a shit and a piss, then hits the shower. He is never too far from his cell phone though...
Maak's cell is his connection with his buddies. His buddies are not much more energetic than he is, but around three in the afternoon everyday, they make the effort to get together, smoke their cigarettes in order to look tough, then head out to party somewhere, mooching money off some unsuspecting dork. Meanwhile, his sister Miuw does just about anything and everything in the house....laundry (by hand, like most Thai's), cooking, cleaning, folding, arranging, dusting....
But, if Miuw has to venture out away from home...say, six or eight kilometers, she's freaking lost. Will get on her cellphone and call Mama for help. It's like she loses her brain. Seventeen years old and practically helpless.
I told Mam once that the best thing for her two kids would be to get them OUT of Wang Hu Gwang...out of Chum Phae...out of Khon Kaen...and get them jobs...experience. But no, both of them have no experience because mama hasn't been around to give it.
Mam informs me "The Family" wants her to stay home. They don't want her to return to Southern Thailand where we live. So, she turns her back on me, the two dogs Puppy and Chok, the house, everything...
Then I find out today she absconded with over 70,000 baht of my money. So, I'm pressing charges with the police and hiring a lawyer if need be.
There's really no such thing as divorce since her and I are not conventionally married. Not on paper anyway. It's easier to say by Thai eyes (which may cause some complications but not many I don't think) we're married, but according to the U.S. Embassy and Consulate, we're not legally married.
Surely this is not an unheard of situation. Many farangs (foreigners) end up in this situation, but I trusted her. Not so much in the end, as I'd caught her in several lies. But, life goes on I suppose.
For me, I've been in so many screwed up relationships, been with so many untrustworthy women, and been in so many countries that make situations like this even more difficult, that I'm almost immune to the pain and disappointment any more.
Things will level out. It'll just take time...
And I've nothing but....time.
Mused by Jeeem at the following date and time: 5/12/2010 01:43:00 PM